Super Hydlide
Jared looks very concerned as he plays Super Hydlide. Synopsis One of Jared's most hated, traumatic childhood experiences has a sequel! Jared has never played it before, and is expecting the worst. Jared actually likes the fact that the game has classes, but figures out that the class names have been switched around. Jared buys a dagger and suddenly walks ridiculously slowly. Jared demonstrates that a dagger is too much, but a small knife is perfect. Even money weighs the character down! Jared is happy to see an attack button, but suddenly dies and has no idea why. He finds that the character is hungry, which rapidly decreases health. The first few hours of this game is spent killing things to afford food and being able to sleep. He buys some leather armor and finds it pretty cool that it actually appears on his character. The character starts to randomly teleporting to Jared's horror! He finds the graveyard and finds the gravestone he needs to read, but can't read it because he is too stupid. Of course, he must kill things to get smarter! At level 5, he's still to stupid! Level 6, still to stupid! At level 7, Jared was finally able to push the grave. In the tower, the graphics are so bad that Jared can't tell the difference between what is a wall and what isn't. After beating the first boss, he gets to the cloud city, and sky dives to the water city. He finds a pack of Sega games. What do these games do? "It's a joke." Jared tries to investigate a cave, but it is too dark, so he needs to buy a lamp for $10,000 - gold dollars! This game requires tedious grinding, just like the first game did. The lamp only gives Jared a very small amount of light, and dies a lot because of it. Jared has to find a wall to walk through to get to the dragon boss. Jared discovers that he can't open the menu during boss fights, so he can't use magic or heal. A fortress appears and inside it are robots - which Jared stabs with his sword. Jared is going to space - after falling through the world! Then he begins walking around in space! Screw physics! Because Video Games! Jared needs to become one dimensional to progress, and Jared expected the entire game to go flat (it's a smart joke!). Before going into the City of Illusion, Jared screwed up. In his haste to throw away items so he could find more, he accidentally threw away the horn that lets you get there, so he can't get back to this town. Jared has made the game impossible to continue. So, he did the only thing he could think of - he emulated it! Jared played the game from the start - but now he has a light saber! Jared gets killed a lot to the final boss, because his light saber isn't the required weapon, so he has to backtrack to find a fire sword, and then goes all the way back to beat it. But nothing happens after fighting it for a while, so Jared does the most sensible thing. He jumps into its mouth! This boss then talks about some crystal for some reason, and then says that he is dying but will live forever so Jared doesn't know what to believe. The game ends after a few glamour shots. It's not a good game but it isn't abysmal. It's clunky and frustrating, but has some cool moments. The equipment changing your appearance is pretty cool. The concepts of weight, food and resting is good, but wasn't executed well. Forced grinding is still here to pad out the gameplay. The music doesn't make Jared want to kill himself! Jared doesn't want to play Super Hydlide again. It's not to the worst Hydlide game ever because Virtual Hydlide is! Category:ProReview Category:Videos